Life beyond Radford
Jacqui Marshdale ( Mendl )
- Olympic Torch Relay Participant, Leeton
Painting with Soul What does life look for you now?
I’m learning that life doesn’t go as I expected. I’m now re-married and living in Forster, navigating life’s opportunities and challenges and exploring what it means to be an older person in a semi-retired lifestyle with a blended family of young adults. I enjoy painting and photography, and travelling Australia and overseas with my husband a fun and wonderful pastime. I love cooking, gardening as well as fishing, kayaking on the lake in Forster.
Tell us what you are passionate about?
Painting acrylic artworks for pleasure and therapy. Also, travel with my husband to new and interesting places in Asia to eat good food and meet the locals. We also focus on safe travel locations and practices for people living with immunocompromised health conditions, including Cystic Fibrosis and double lung transplant. I love fishing and gardening with my husband, vanlife travel, and experiencing life with six young adult children, their partners and fiancées, extended family and now Rod’s grand-daughter.
When you were young, what were you hoping to be when you grew up?
A tourism manager or air hostess
What is your favourite Radford moment?
School discos where we dressed up and everyone brought a plate of food. In those days the discos were hosted by other schools because Radford didn’t have a hall.
Do you have a particular role model or inspirational figure from Radford or now?
I was highly influenced by my Art and Japanese teachers while at school. I also admire gentle spiritedness in people I meet.
How easy was it to decide what to do in life?
Just went with what felt right at the time. Heaps of expectations set on us at Yr 12, but got involved in the decision process and took it from there - just say yes to everything at that age. I tried out for Rotary and Uni and kept doing Duke of Edinburgh Award, and through these, I met my best friends. As I get older it’s not easy, because I know whatever I decide impacts other people including my 4 boys, my husband and our families too.
Did your further study or career go exactly as you'd planned?
Nothing like it. I failed a few subjects so was at Uni a bit longer than I expected. I then had the opportunity to travel to Japan as an exchange student which opened up the chance to be one of 10 Australians on the Ship for World Youth travelling to South America from Japan in 1995. After a year of fundraising for the Spastic Centre, I was Ambassador for the program which took me to smaller country towns. I travelled to Leeton and ironically found myself there starting a married life and a farmer of 17 years and PR person for SunRice Australia. I learned kinesiology which was an eye-opener for me. Unfortunately I was forced to move out of a home due to my now ex-husband’s infidelity. Our 4 teenage sons continued to live at the family home. They’re now scattered across eastern Australia and I re-married to a very kind man in Rod, whose knowledge and experience in living with CF and a double lung transplant is instrumental in helping my recovery from mental trauma associated with the divorce and creating a wellbeing into our “golden years”.
What do you know now, that you wish you'd known when you were at Radford?
Being busy isn’t a good thing. And avoiding conflict or engaging in distractions is just prolonging the inevitable conversation. I’m always learning more about my hard-headedness and my need to listen and share vulnerability in relationships. I wish I’d known more about trust and vulnerability when I was at school.
What advice do you have for current students?
Ask for advice from someone you trust will be honest with you. They’re the ones who have your best interests at heart.
Anything else that you would like to share?
I’ve a confession to make: I’ve forever projected being a good person but deep down I’ve hurt those I love by being selfish and arrogant. I thought being a “strong independent woman “ was admirable but, I’ve learned that being a strong, nurturing and respectful wife is worth more than anything else in the world. No one is better or worse than anyone else because we all make mistakes and it’s better for us to offer forgiveness and understanding to those we love.